What is a Wedding Vow

Wedding Vow - tradition

A Wedding Vow is a statement that you make to your bride or groom when you marry in order to express your love and devotion. Some ceremonies, whether civil or religious, can have words that cannot be deviated from, but in modern western society they are not binding in law. Hence, if you do not honor and cherish, you will not be prosecuted. Otherwise, divorcees would by definition have to serve a prison sentence or face a fine prior to the divorce as they admit to failing in their marriage vows.

Nevertheless the Wedding Vow is very important to most couples, and many either devise their own vows, or add additions to what is mandatory. If you get married in a church or temple, or any other religious setting, you will almost certainly have a set form of words that you must use, required both by the civil authorities from a secular and legal point of view, and by the specific religion from a sectarian point of view.

Wedding Vow - requirements

If you wish to use your own form of words, you should first ask for information on what is permissible and what is not. Once you have that information then you can add whatever you like to the mandatory statements. It is not that these statements are necessarily legally binding, but that they are traditional and most ceremonies like to stick to tradition of the Wedding Vow. Hence, the statement “I John/Mary take thee to be my husband/wife, to have and to hold . . . ”, etc is pretty much universal in civil and Christian ceremonies in the Western world, ending in “. . . till death us do part”.

However, there is no real legal requirement to use that form of words, and once made to satisfy the venue, local authority or religious body, you can be imaginative. “I promise never to nag you on condition that you keep me well endowed with money”. You can even sing your special vow to each other, but what you must keep in mind is that there are witnesses to your vows, and although the Wedding Vow might not be legally binding, others may remind you of them. So don’t be TOO outrageous in trying to be unique or different, or you might be the talk of your group of friends.

Wedding Vow - composing

To be realistic, however, most couples that want their vows to a bit different will pen them and either sing them or recite them. It is not the vows that you make that matter, it is how the Wedding Vow is made and expressed, and how they impress those that hear them being made. You can look for a few lines from the Bible or your favorite author or poet, and quote them if you want. Whatever it is that you decide to do, your vows are important to you and to your partner, even if they are purely symbolic and not legally binding promises.

To compose your own Wedding Vow, there are some simple and logical steps that you can take to make it an easier process that it might at first appear. Think of the qualities in your loved one that led you to falling in love, and make a list. It sounds a bit crass, but it can easily be done. Then add a few more reasons why you want to spend the rest of your life with that person. To do that is a massive commitment, so you must have some real reasons for wanting to do so.

Wedding Vow - memorize

Now put all that into a form that you can say in a sentence or two and learn it for your Wedding Vow. You should not find it difficult to do, and that can be the basis of your wedding vows. Your vows can be an expression of love and devotion rather than a promise, but if you have to make a promise of a commitment then you should find it easy to do so.

A Wedding Vow should be no more than can be stated in about two minutes on average, though some vows take as long as five and more while others last about 30 seconds. The only legally binding part is when you state that you take your partner as your wife or husband. Keep in mind though, that while the majority of your vows might not be binding in law, they are a moral commitment that you are giving to your new spouse, and as such you have a moral duty to stick to them.

Wedding Vow - commitment

A Wedding Vow is statement of love and commitment, and should never be looked upon as a mere legal formality, since not only is not necessarily a legal requirement, but is also certainly a lot more than a mere formality.










Wedding Vow

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